Imagine it as the secret sauce that really makes leaders shine. Some folks call it the “X factor,” while others think of it as a special gift only a lucky few possess. But when it comes to being an outstanding leader, there’s one undeniable ingredient that sets them apart: a killer leadership presence. Whether you’re running a small team, dreaming of a political career, heading up a massive corporation, teaching, or even channeling your inner Oprah, this quality acts like a magnet, drawing people’s attention in.
In their book Leadership Presence, authors Belle Linda Halpern and Kathy Lubar define it as “the ability to authentically connect with the thoughts and feelings of others in order to motivate and inspire them to achieve a desired outcome.” If that sounds like a jumble of words to you, Simon offers a simpler definition: It is a unique combination of grativas, basic savvy, and the ability to make others feel both safe and inspired.
Furthermore, it is not something you are born with; it is something you learn.
Like many of the skills we teach here at The Optimism Company, there are few institutional curriculums available to learn the art of leadership presence. In fact, most leaders with great leadership presence learned it by observing other great leaders before them. If you are interested in an accelerated course on learning leadership presence, we asked Simon Sinek, our founder and Chief Optimist, for his five-tip cheat sheet.
His first piece of advice? Don’t fake it before you make it. “There is an irony that comes with leadership presence, which is that you should never pretend to be something you are not,” he says. “There are people who put on a facade and shout orders to appear as leaders, when in reality, they are not leaders. However, you do need to present yourself differently to build leadership presence. When you are more junior, you can be silly. As you advance in seniority, you must remember that a whisper becomes a shout.”
With that in mind, what follow are Simon’s top tips for building your own leadership presence. Read on, and if you’re interested in more great advice you can use to level up your confidence at work, be sure to check out Simon’s #1 bestselling course, The Art of Presenting, today.
1. You Need Constant Situational Awareness
Never underestimate the power of being really, really good at reading the room at work. “It’s like being a parent,” says Simon. “Roughhousing with your kids is fun, but a good parent knows when to stop, and when it’s going too far. Good leaders have to have constant situational awareness.”
Simon notes that he’s seen leaders suffer when they lose this focus. “I’ve seen leaders lose their leadership presence because they failed to read the room,” he says. “They allow people to say things that shouldn’t be said. You’re managing the room. I watch the room constantly. If someone is struggling to get a word in, I’ll step in and be like, ‘Hold on one second. Emily, you’re trying to say something?’ So I’m constantly paying attention to who’s struggling to speak, who’s speaking too much.”
What’s more, you don’t have to be the appointed leader to develop this leadership presence. “You never have to be the most senior person in the room to do this,” says Simon. “You can have unofficial authority simply by interrupting and saying, ‘James is trying to say something.””
2. Always Remember: Everything You Say Carries Weight
If you’re in a position of authority, it’s important to remember that “everything you say is magnified and carries weight,” says Simon. “A compliment can make someone’s week. On the other hand, a little offhanded comment can destroy someone. Everything is just exaggerated. And so you’re not changing who you are. You’re still yourself. But you have to remember that absolutely everything that comes out of you is louder, bigger, more sensitive, spotlighted, and more exaggerated. A whisper becomes a shout, and you have to be ultra-sensitive to compliments and criticisms.”
3. Yes, Fashion and Body Language Are Important
In fear of saying something wildly old-fashioned in a world populated by hoodies and Nike Dunk Lows, it’s simply a fact that how you present yourself—both in terms of appearance and body language—impacts your leadership presence. “Even if you’re a male and you don’t care that no one else is wearing a collared shirt in a casual office, it’s helpful to look more presentable,” says Simon. “Take a tip from Ronald Reagan. He always wore a jacket and tie in the Oval Office. It was out of respect for the office, and it largely set the tone.”
Also, remember that human beings don’t just communicate with words. We send powerful messages with our bodies even if we don’t know we’re doing it. “Posture matters,” says Simon. “You can’t sit in a meeting hunched over and expect that people will think that you’re the leader. You should sit up straight. What I notice when I’m slouching or I notice that my physical presence is lazier, I’m communicating the wrong things to the room. Also, sitting up straight reminds me to pay attention to the room, to make sure everybody’s feelings are heard.”
4. Always Protect the Group
Fact: Leaders are leaders because they, well, lead. “As hierarchical animals, we kind of want to know who we can trust and who we can follow, and we’re constantly assessing and judging each other,” says Simon. “When you have all of these leadership presence skills, what you’re communicating to the room is I’m aware and I’m going to protect the team.”
Simon can’t emphasize enough the importance of projecting safety and protection. “This is where people confuse authority and leadership. It doesn’t matter if you’re stronger or louder. What you’re communicating with good leadership presence is that the leader goes first. That’s why we call you a leader. You lead. You go first towards the danger. You speak truth to power.”
5. Embrace Your Inner Idiot
One of the best ways to build leadership presence is to ask the questions that everyone is thinking but no one else is asking. “You’re willing to be stupid,” says Simon. “You say, ‘I don’t understand.’ No one understands, but leaders are the first to say it.”
At the end of the day, this will build the trust and respect that comes with leadership presence. “If you’re willing to go first into danger and discomfort and help ideas move forwards, what that communicates is trustworthiness and protection,” says Simon. “And by the way, it’s not always about leading people. It could be leading the ideas. Saying, ‘Okay, let’s try it!’ Or, ‘We’ve been tackling this idea with one train of thought. Let’s try something else again.’”
