The story plays out everywhere: brilliant individual contributors get promoted to manage people with nothing more than “figure it out as you go.”
No wonder middle managers are the most miserable people in any organization. That’s not our opinion. It’s theirs.
We surveyed 971 middle managers worldwide for our new report, “The Top 10 Things Middle Managers Desperately Need (But Are Afraid to Ask For).” The findings were heartbreaking: 57% are actively struggling with fundamental leadership capabilities that were never part of their training.
They spend just 41% of their time on actual people management. The rest? Administrative busywork.
But here’s the hope: they’re hungry for growth. They want to be the leaders their teams need. They just need someone to show them how.
Our research identified three critical skill gaps that, once addressed, transform both manager confidence and team performance.
The 3 Skills That Change Everything
1. Human-Centered Communication
The skill 55% struggle with most
This is about more than writing better emails. It’s about the conversations that keep managers awake at 2 AM:
– How do you correct someone without crushing their spirit?
– How do you motivate someone who’s checked out?
– How do you disagree with your boss without career suicide?
Most learn through trial and error, leaving damaged relationships behind. Managers see themselves as “coaches,” yet reality forces them into taskmaster roles, buried in spreadsheets instead of building people.
In practice: Master courageous conversations. Deliver feedback that grows people. Create psychological safety where team members feel heard and valued. (If you’re looking to level up skills like these, feel free to explore The Optimism Library, home to all of Simon’s great leadership frameworks.)
2. Virtual and Hybrid Leadership
The challenge facing 43.4% of managers
Hybrid work changed everything about managing people. Most managers still apply in-person techniques to virtual environments, creating “productivity paranoia”—disconnected leaders who micromanage and erode trust.
“Management by walking around” dies when half your team works from different locations. Managers need new frameworks for building culture, maintaining performance, and fostering relationships across screens and time zones.
In practice: Master “management by checking in”—frequent, shorter, purpose-driven conversations. Read virtual body language. Facilitate engaging online meetings. Create rituals that maintain team connection across distances.
3. Emotional Intelligence and Resilience
The foundation 75% are missing
The most overlooked skill: managing your own emotional state while helping others navigate theirs. Our research shows 75% of middle managers experience burnout—making them the most stressed level in any organization. Nearly half (43.2%) feel fundamentally disconnected from work.
When managers can’t handle their own overwhelm, they can’t support their teams. This cascades downward: Gallup research confirms managers account for 70% of variance in employee engagement.
In practice: Build stress management systems beyond “take a deep breath.” Learn to absorb pressure from above while shielding teams below. Develop emotional stamina for leading people through uncertainty.
The Path Forward
Middle managers aren’t asking for miracles. They want practical training in the human side of leadership. Skills that can be learned, practiced, and mastered with the right support.
Organizations that see this as opportunity, not crisis, will win. When companies invest in developing these capabilities, they see dramatic improvements: better strategy execution, stronger culture, higher retention, improved results.
The question isn’t whether your middle managers need these skills—the research proves they do. The question is whether your organization will provide the support they need.
Because when you have confident, emotionally intelligent, communication-savvy middle managers, everything gets easier. Strategy gets implemented. Culture strengthens. People stay. Results soar.
The potential is already there.
We just need to notice it.
